National Enquirer: Three more Cruz babes come out of the closet — “Lying Ted” only tells the truth about 6% of the time

April 3rd, 2016

Awake Goy

According to an update by the National Enquirer, three new Ted Cruz lovers have spoken out, bringing the total to 8. This confirms earlier rumors that much more was to come. The subhead on the story reads:

“Just how many mistresses and lovers can one man have?”

MSM outlets are now throwing caution to the winds and going after the hottest sex scandal story in decades. The brother of one of Cruz’s lovers, who regularly appears on CNN as a contributor confirmed his sister’s involvement with Cruz:

“It’s true, They were together only a few times. She was transfixed by Ted. He has a way of selling ice to an Eskimo.”

The brother said that his sister, is married with children and that the affair occurred:

“Right before Ted’s campaign for Senate, they’d get together when Cruz visited DC. The whole family knows, everybody knows about this.”

The shocked husband:

“… knows all about this, but still loves her. It was a mistake, but everybody makes mistake. Ted Cruz is like Clinton though — he preys on young admiring women,” the relative said.
“Randy Ted” as the Enquirer labeled him, is accused now of having at least 8 affairs in multiple places, such as closets and bathrooms on campaign buses.

Cruz lashed out at a Wisconsin news conference, according to NBC News:

“It is a tabloid smear and it has come from Donald Trump and his henchmen.”

However evidence of the trysts is just starting to build and will no doubt continue for days. For example, the very day that Ted Cruz was showing off his Winston Churchill temporary tattoo on Fox News on April 1, 2014, one of his purported lovers, Amanda Carpenter, posted a picture of her new Winston Churchill temporary tattoo on her left shoulder on the very same day – April 1, with the simple caption, “Had to!” Interestingly, Carpenter is the person who started the anti-Trump enemies list – a little project that was clearly an attempt to sink Trump and help Cruz. These temporary tattoos can be purchased on ebay for less than three dollars.

Senator Cruz’s denial of the trysts comes at a bad time for Cruz as Politifact recently tabulated the truthfulness of Cruz’s recent statements. Of 98 Cruz statements Politifact examined, only 6 were judged to be true – yup, Lying Ted only tells the truth about 6% of the time.

I’m Still reporting from Washington. Good day.